8 out of 10 rapes are committed by someone the survivor knows (RAINN).

Sexual assault is never the fault of the victim/survivor. While nothing is fail-safe, here are some items that everyone should consider to make Regis a safer community:

General Safety

Lock your door when you leave your room/house or are asleep.

If you are out late at night, walk with friends you know well.

If you see a concerning situation, do your best to intervene if you can do so safely. Use the Bystander Intervention techniques:

  • Take a Direct approach: check in with those involved and confront the situation head on.
  • Distract those involved, and remove the people you are concerned about from the situation
  • Delegate: Tell someone who can help you intervene, like calling 9-1-1 or campus safety at 303.458.4122
  • Delay: If the above aren’t options, keep those involved in sight until you can act.

On Dates and at Parties

Sexual assault is never the fault of the victim/survivor. If you use some of these techniques and are sexual assault, it is not your fault. If you do not use some of these techniques and are sexual assaulted, it is not your fault.

When first meeting someone, consider meeting in a public place and avoid being alone until you have gotten to know one another.

When you are ready to go out or to a party, have a plan. Know where you are going, who you are going with, and how much you plan on drinking.

Before you and your partner start drinking, have a conversation about your limits, and what do and do not want to do later that night. When you are intoxicated, it can be hard to judge a situation. Rather than run the risk of crossing a line, know where you and your partner stand before you drink.

Always watch your drink being prepared, or if you can, prepare all of your drinks yourself. If you lose sight of your drink, get a new one—that way you know what is in it and how much alcohol you are consuming. Eighty percent of campus sexual assaults involve alcohol, and overconsuming can be risky.

Accepting a drink from someone you don’t know can be risky. A lot of date rape drugs are undetectable when mixed with alcohol. They can be flavorless.  

Stay with your group of friends. Make sure a dependable friend knows where you are and who you are with at all times.

You don’t have to spend time with someone who you don’t know or trust. Even if someone asks you to leave with them, you can say you’d rather stay with your group of friends.

If you do hit it off with someone you just met, make sure you both are able to consent to any after-party activities. Get a clear, willing, and sober yes. 

If you start to feel strange or unusually intoxicated, seek help from a friend. Do not leave with someone you just met or that you do not know.

If you are uncomfortable, get out of the situation if you can. In this kind of situation, you do not owe anyone anything. If it’s between you feeling comfortable & safe and possibly offending someone, it’s okay to offend someone!

Reduce the Risk of Committing Sexual Assault

If you find yourself in the position of being the initiator of sexual behavior, you owe respect to your potential partner. These suggestions can help you to reduce your risk for crossing your partner’s boundaries:

  • Listen carefully. Take time to hear what the other person has to say. If you feel they are not being direct or are giving you a “mixed message,” ask for clarification.
  • If your partner says “no” at any point, believe them and stop. “No” does not mean “yes” or that you should try to convince your partner to continue. If they say “no”, stop what you are doing and talk to your partner to establish boundaries.
  • Don’t make assumptions about a person’s behavior. If a person is dressed provocatively, they are intoxicated, or they agree to go to your room or walk home with you, this does NOT mean they want to have sex with you. If someone has had sex with you before, this does not mean they are willing to have sex with you again. Also, if your partner consents to kissing or other sexual activities, this does not mean they are consenting to all sexual activities. Before initiating any sexual activity, ask your partner if that is what they want to happen.
  • Establish consent when you both are sober. This is especially important if you both plan on drinking. Have the conversation before you go out to establish boundaries and keep everyone safe.
  • Silence, passivity, or the absence of ”no” is not consent. Trying to convince someone to continue is coercion, and even if they “give in,” that is not consent.
  • Having sex with someone who is incapable of giving consent is sexual assault. If you have sex with someone who is drugged, intoxicated, passed out, or is otherwise incapable of saying no or knowing what is going on around them, that is sexual assault.
  • Be careful in group situations; resist pressure from friends to participate in non-consensual acts.
  • Take action if you believe someone is at risk. If you see someone in trouble or someone pressuring another person, don’t be afraid to intervene.
  • Remember that sexual assault is a crime. It is never acceptable to force sexual activity, no matter what the circumstances. If your partner says no, pushes you away, is too intoxicated, or is no longer actively participating, you must stop.

Reduce the Risk of Being Sexually Assaulted

Sexual assault is never the fault of the victim/survivor. If you use some of these techniques and are sexual assault, it is not your fault. If you do not use some of these techniques and are sexual assaulted, it is not your fault.

Know your sexual intentions and limits. Communicate them to your partner. If you are unsure of what you want, tell your partner to respect your feelings. You have the right to say NO to any unwanted sexual contact at any time.

Let your partner know what is and is not ok before you start drinking. Establishing boundaries before either of you are intoxicated will help you establish consent and stay within each other’s limits. 

If you say “No,” say it like you mean it. Back up your words with a firm voice and clear body language. Do not assume that someone will automatically know how you feel or will eventually “get the message” without you having to say anything.

Remember that some people think that drinking, dressing provocatively, or going to someone’s room is saying you are willing to have sex. This is not true, but they may need a reminder. Be clear up front about your limits in such situations.

Listen to your gut feeling. If you feel uncomfortable or think you might be at risk, leave the situation immediately and go to a safe place.

Don’t be afraid to “make waves” if you feel threatened. If you feel you are being pressured or coerced into sexual activity, state your feelings and leave the situation.

Take care of your friends and ask that they take care of you.